Oh what a week!

We had a rough few days this week with missed nap times and a bit of a tummy bug. Let me tell you, babies are complicated! They can't just talk and say "hey mom, my tummy hurts!" They apparently use secret code cries and hand signals to let us know what's going on...and no one gave me the decipher!

All of last week something was wrong...Alexa was vomiting, I thought it was because I gave her avocado...Alexa had a low grade fever, I thought it was from teething...Alexa was pulling off and crying during nursing (until she refused to nurse at all), I thought she might be going on a nursing strike, or maybe she had an ear ache. I was wrong...about everything! I brought her to the pediatrician's on Monday after an entire weekend of inconsolable, heart-breaking crying. I told the doctor what I thought: ear infection, and she told me I was wrong. She then told me that Alexa has a stomach virus. WOW, that came from left field, but actually, if you look at all of her symptoms again, well...I guess the doctor could be right. Poor baby, it's horrible to see her unhappy and not feeling well.

Thank god it's Thursday! The Papa comes home tonight and this Mama will be begging for a sleep break!

Despite an upset tummy, Alexa has learned some pretty cool new things this week. She was able to drink out of her sippy cup all by herself for the first time.

She also found her toes for the first time...while she was in the tub. It definitely made for an interesting bath time, since she completely refused to do anything but hang onto her toes, wave them and wiggle around in the tub!

A baby's gonna do what a baby's gonna do.

Towards the end of my pregnancy and then again after Alexa was born, a friend of mine told me not to expect to be able to have my child on a schedule any time soon. She said that as soon as the baby would get into a routine they would switch it up and do the total opposite the next day. She said knowing this up front would save me a lot of headaches. I managed to keep her advice in mind for a long time...then I actively tried to schedule my baby. It worked for three (3) days. They were three amazingly glorious days. She slept wonderful naps (she did so before this schedule as well), went to bed nicely at night and best of all...SLEPT at night. She was only waking up ONCE...that is one time from bed time to wake up time. A-M-A-Z-I-N-G. Then today occurred and she said that was enough of that. She has napped randomly, barely eaten at all and was a super crank butt all day. Now, she might have a little cold (that's what I'm saying it is...), or she's just being a baby and she's had enough of my routine and she's switching it up. Well, as long as she eats, sleeps and poops as dictated by the job description of a baby, well, then we will figure out what her new schedule is tomorrow!

P.S. Dear love baby, I really hope you continue to sleep so well at night. It makes Mommy very, very happy and I extra love you for it too! Love, Mama

On-demand vs. Scheduled Breastfeeding

Before I moved to Austria [for love ;)], I was an Infant Room Teacher, an Au pair and a nanny. I had been around children, infants and toddlers my entire life because I came from such a large family. I started babysitting when I was 11 years old (what the heck were those parents thinking?!?!). My baby knowledge is extensive. I have trained babies to sleep, to eat, to be pretty awesome kids. I know how to do this. Let's face it, I was a baby guru! It is (was) in my blood. And then I got pregnant and had my own baby. All previous knowledge and know how flew right out the window. Well, I've had enough of brain dead baby mamma and am calling on all my old guruness to please come back to me!

When Alexa was born, the nurses and midwives told me to feed her whenever she rooted, but also not to let her go more than three hours without nursing. I have basically let her dictate her feeding schedule (and every other aspect of her life and mine) since birth. Now, I'm over it. I am so exhausted and cannot cope with waking up every 2-3 hours at night just so she can have a "sip" and then watch as she falls seamlessly back to sleep while I am wide awake for the next hour! Mamma needs a nap. That is why, I have decided to start scheduling my previously free spirited, any time you want it baby. It is hard and it hurts me...physically hurts me. My boobs are now the size of watermelons (previously they were honeydew melons) and they are literally throbbing, but I am holding fast. I will nurse her every three hours during the day. I am hoping that this will help her establish a better feeding pattern and that she will actually nurse properly before bedtime and then (for the love of God please) sleep longer stretches at night.

July 1st was day 1...and it sucked. My original plan was to have our day start at 7am. She normally wakes up to nurse around 4am, so I didn't really think that pushing her next feeding to 7am would be that big of a deal. It was and I caved. Our day went like this...

5am Wake up, play, snuggle, try and play some more, do not nurse!
6am Nurse (Yup, I caved that easily - my happy baby turned into super sad baby. No good.)
Morning playtime and hang out time
9am Nurse
10:15-11am Morning Nap
12pm Nurse
12:40-1pm Cat nap (disaster)
Afternoon nap time was a disaster. Normally Alexa nurses before she goes down for her AWESOME 2-3 hour nap...it wasn't time to nurse...she wouldn't go down for a nap. I put her in her crib and tried to let her chill out, but that led to serious crying. We read books and I rocked her until she fell asleep (so snuggly and I love it, but rocking her to sleep is not a habit I would like to get into.).
2:15-4:20pm Afternoon nap (FINALLY!)
3pm dream feed (she was still sleeping and I really wanted to keep the feeding schedule, especially since it's day 1)
4:30pm dinner (peas and carrots)
6pm Nurse and bed
6-7:40pm Sleep
(I tried to let her kind of fuss and find her binky, but after about 5-10 minutes it was clear that she was just wide awake!)
9pm Nurse and bed
1:45am (!!!) Nurse and straight back to bed
4:45am Bink
5:30am (!!!) Wake up!

I got so much sleep that night. It was AMAZING!!! By 7am on day 2, I had a load of laundry in, the dishwasher was running and dinner was already prepped. Go energizer Mommy!

Day 2 went REALLY REALLY well! Basically, every 3 hours I nursed her. She took a one hour morning nap, went down right after her noon feeding for an awesome 2 1/2 hour afternoon nap, ate dinner, nursed, had a bath and then went to bed at 9pm. She slept until 3:30am!!!!! Nursed and then went back to sleep until 7:15am!!! Go baby go!

Being a mom is definitely a "learn as you go" job. It's the best job I've ever had!

Jet Lag

Holy moly am I beat! A six hour time difference plus a nursing baby equals one exhausted momma! Alexa was so amazing both on the flight to the US and the flight back. After she ate her cereal, she totally passed out for the duration of the long haul flight. Baby...you rock! I was actually able to sleep for almost an hour myself which was much needed. By the time we landed in Vienna I was totally shot. I slept for the majority of the drive back to Linz and we even took another short family nap once we got to the apartment.

Monday was a total killer. Thankfully, my mother in law stepped in and hung out with us all day so that she could lend a hand with Alexa and let me nap a little throughout the day. My one "cat nap" turned into a two hour long pass out session! Oops!

Alexa seems to be adjusting alright to the time difference. The only problem we're really having is that she won't go to sleep unless she is rocked (thanks Mom!) and has the boob as her binky. Any advice as to how to stop this would be great!

The absolute worst thing is that Michael is in Vienna all week and I'm alone with baby and our new inhabitant...jet lag.  I'm hoping that a good night's sleep will help and that the jet lag won't be so bad tomorrow.

Baby Antics #1

Babies like to pull tricks on their parents and family members. You know you've fallen prey to a little munchkin when the following has occurred...

The baby wakes up at an ungodly hour in the morning, crying, fussing and carrying on until everyone in the house is wide awake, playing with and cheering them up. Once this task has been accomplished then baby dictator decides it's time for a nap!

If this has happened to you, you should totally read The Boss Baby by Marla Frazee. It's basically the autobiography of your new life!

Hi, my name is Danielle and I'm a...

After a long and hard day of bean raising, or a short and easy day, I like to engage in what I call some chocolate tasting. Now, that might be putting it a little lightly...I realize this, but my denial is what makes it acceptable for me to go out the next day and buy another chocolate bar...or three. I am a chocoholic. I can't help myself.

Pre-pregnancy I was a smoker. I loved being a smoker. I tried quitting pre-pregnancy and I just turned into an evil, mean and bitchy person. No one wanted to be around me. In fact, I didn't want to be around myself! But, alas, I got pregnant and quit immediately. It was the easiest (HAHAHAHA) thing I had ever done. Well, the decision to quit was the easiest thing I had ever decided, but the actual act of quitting was incredibly difficult. I succeeded though and that is all that counts.

I have a very addictive personality. The fact that I am not an alcoholic or a total stoner is amazing even to me. I click pens like a lunatic. I'm addicted to deodorant. And I am currently addicted to chocolate. Here in Austria we have the 300 gram Milka bar. This is like seven Hershey bars. I can eat a 300 gram Milka bar in about ten minutes. I have an illness. I have honestly tried stopping myself, but the sun goes down and my chocolate craving just takes over my body. I try to tell myself that the 22 minutes of Tae Bo I did in the morning allows me to have a few small squares, but then the next thing I know, 3/4 of the candy bar is gone.

I have even tried switching to disgusting white chocolate since the milk chocolate seems to upset Alexa's stomach. I am now addicted to white chocolate. I don't even like the taste of it, but I have to have at least one candy bar a night. The white chocolate bars I buy in the smaller 100 gram size (about 2 1/3 Hershey bars) and I rationalize that this is okay and even better because before I was eating an entire 300 gram chocolate bar every night, now I'm only eating a 100 gram bar. I am sick in the head. And yet I wonder why I've stopped losing weight and none of my pre-pregnancy clothes fit.

Thanks Milka. You're ruining my life.

Hi, my name is Danielle and I'm a chocoholic.

All by myself...

This has been a relatively trying week. Michael went back to working in Vienna all week long, leaving me alone at home to take care of Alexa. Please don't get me wrong, I LOVE being home with her and wouldn't want to be anywhere else, but I count on the break that comes at 5 o'clock when Michael gets home from work. I depend on that nice, long, hot, relaxing shower to wash the stress of the day away and just for that "Me Time." It doesn't matter if I spend 30 minutes on the computer, or watching TV, or even going for a walk. I just need some down time.

I kind of see myself as Superwoman. I've always been very independent and self-reliant. As long as I had my mental support system (a.k.a. the greatest friends ever), then I was good to go. There wasn't a situation that I couldn't get through. Being home alone with an infant is trying. You don't realize how important it is to take five minutes for yourself or to just get a break.  I didn't realize how much I depended on Michael just to hold Alexa for a few minutes so I could take a shower, make dinner or be able to go to the bathroom without worrying that she's going to start crying. I didn't realize how important it was, it is, for me to have another adult to talk to. Even on the best days when crying is at a minimum, it is still a long and hard day. I have always had respect for my friends that are single parents and now I have even more respect for them. They are both mom and dad 24/7 with no breaks and no one to give them a break. You guys are AMAZING!

The next three weeks I'll be on my own (at night time) with Alexa while we are on vacation. I just hope she keeps sleeping as well as she has been so that I am able to get some sleep too! Wish us luck! This will be a big week of firsts for Alexa:
  
     First time on an airplane,
     First time leaving the country,
     First time in the United States,
     First time seeing all of her uncles and grandparents in the US (my mom is the exception),
     First time going on a road trip (CT to DE)

And I'm pretty sure that this is the short list. There will be so many new and exciting things happening in the next few weeks. Be ready for pictures, lots and lots of pictures!!!

Baby Birth Control

Who needs birth control when you have a newborn? No one, that's who. You barely get any sleep at night so you are exhausted beyond belief. Any and all energy goes into caring for your little coffee bean or trying to take a shower or brush your teeth. The house is a mess, there's dirty laundry everywhere and for god's sake can someone please vacuum??

Even though sex was the last thing on my mind for the first few weeks after Alexa's birth, those thoughts do start creeping in again. And if your husband is anything like mine, they get a voice too. A loud voice.

Now for those of you moms out there, you know that you can't have sex for 6-8 weeks after the birth of your little bean, or until your doctor gives you the thumbs up. I could still barely walk 6 weeks after Alexa's birth, so sex was not even on the table. For those of you who didn't know that, it's true, write it down and then add a few weeks because that will be when you might be ready for sex again. Maybe.

I finally had my "Post birth" checkup at 7 1/2 weeks postpartum and was given the all clear from my doctor. I wanted to be informed, so we discussed the different birth control options I had. I was, however, shocked and stunned by what my doctor said.  I was told, "Well, if you're breastfeeding..." We do not live in a third world country, we live in Austria.  Apparently, a place with sometimes ridiculous beliefs in old wives tales! My gynecologist literally told me that I wouldn't get knocked up again as long as I was breastfeeding. I also thought I wouldn't get my period as long as I was breastfeeding, but that turned out to be a big fat lie! Anyhow, we've opted for condoms. Wrap it up or get out!

The first time having sex after having a baby is worse than the first time having sex EVER.  Between the fear, anxiety and the pain...it's a freaking wonder that people have more than one kid! I hope I haven't traumatized too many of you, it's not bad every time, but that first time is a doozy!

I'm so glad we've opted to use condoms as our birth control and not something more expensive like an IUD or the pill because honestly at least condoms don't have to be taken every day and can just be pulled out when needed. Although finding the time and energy to have sex seems to be somewhat of a problem. When we do have the time and the energy the baby inevitably wakes up, cries, spits out her binky...anything to keep us from actually having sex! It's like she's trying to make sure that she's an only child for a while!

So don't you worry new moms, not only will you probably not enjoy sex for a good while after giving birth, but on the off chance that you would like to engage in some kind of sexual sport with your spouse, partner, or whomever, you won't be able to because baby birth control will stop you every single time.